Well, must be wondering what is this post all about. . . It's a little about me though. . .
How should I start. . . Maybe I shall start by saying I lie. But only sometimes. Not everytime. Maybe I lie to avoid problems? Lie to make people happy? Lie to get away from something? Lie to gain something? All this I admit I've done before, no doubt. I bet some of you out there does the same thing before too? Right?
Well one thing I've never lie to anyone before, which is my feelings. As I can tell you myself, I could be close with some girls I could be close with other girls or even most of my female friends. But I never lie or cheated any girl feelings.
To me lying is already a big 'sin'. Lying to a person who I adore, I like, I miss, I have deep feelings for is not in my dictionary. I had never cheated on anyone's feeling and had never want that to happen. As I know how pain it is because I had experienced it before. An experienced of being lied and cheated. I felt it, so I know and understand, that is why I will never lie or cheat on feelings.
I will not lie to anyone especially those close friends and girl that I have feelings for.
Maybe by doing, saying or acting the same thing towards different girls makes people think that I treated all the girl friends the same, but NO. There are only few stages of girl friends I made and it is all treated differently.
1st will be stranger girls, I will certainly just say Hi nice to meet you and that's it.
2nd will be hi bye girl friends, which mean meet say hi, leave say bye kinda friends.
3rd will be those who is slightly closer, sharing homework, talk when meet, joke and sometimes hang out kind.
(note: these 3 stages can be included in work and so)
4th will be those even closer that consider to be close friends that can share almost everything from secret, food, drinks and even properties like bags, pillows, blankets, jacket, jokes and everything that comes to the mind.
Finally will be those that I miss, I think of, I want to spend time with, and I have feelings for them which makes me want to bring up to a higher level of relationship kind.
SO there you see, there are different stages of girl frens in my life. Maybe I call them they same way, treated them a little similar or so, but the meaning of it is different. What my heart felt is different in every single stages. I will never never cheat on my own feelings as well as the others which is friends and love ones. Believe me.
If still have doubt in me, I really have nothing to say else. The thinking and the decisions as well as the way you(anyone) see me will be on your own as I'm powerless to control it.
I know this is a akward post, but I just feel it's a need to post it. I want PEOPLE to understand.
That's all for now.
'.'
-kimhan-
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